Stuff People Say to Mixed People

The "Stuff" people say craze has unleashed a frenzy of videos about the experiences people have regarding race relations.  Of course I couldn't help but think it was just a matter of time before "Stuff" people say about mixed people became part of the parody circuit.  And I was right!  There are a few videos out there, but I liked this one the best:



Here is my own string of consciousness about this topic:

What are you?
Oh, you're mixed?  That must be why you have good hair.
You're half Oriental?
Oh let me guess, you're mom is Chinese.
How can you tell the difference between Asians?
Your eyes are so chinky!
You are so exotic!
Don't try to talk Black.
You talk White.
You dress White.
Are you trying to dress Black?
You're mixed?  Kind of like a mutt?
I knew you weren't like other Black people.
You think you're all that because you're light.
Wait, what are you again?
You're Black and Asian?  That's hot!  I'm gonna call you Kimora!

Okay, I think I got  it out of my system.  Well, some people are having fun with this, some people are offended and some people are actually learning.  I am hoping that we can continue to work on learning more about one another and getting more comfortable with our differences.  Let's celebrate each other and all the unique aspects of our race and culture.

What Is You?

So, that is an actual question that someone asked me once.  "A human being," I tartly answered.  But I knew what he meant.  I just didn't feel like dealing with it at that particular moment.  And if you are mixed, like me, then you probably know exactly what I mean.  My mom is Korean and my dad is Black - a good ol military mix.  I managed to get through a good part of my early youth without it being an issue.  It may have been around 4th grade or so before I really recall realizing that I was somehow different.  But not in a negative way - it was just something that I noticed.  The negativity came around 9th grade.  Up until then we had primarily lived overseas on military bases.  Small town Wisconsin gave me a new perspective on race.  It was the first time I recalled hearing the n-word. 

It was also around the same time that I felt confused about marking 'black' when demographic information was requested.  I wasn't just black after all - I was korean too.  My mother saved me from further distress on that one.  She sat me down and affirmed that yes, I was also korean.  But, other people would look at me and see black and that is how I would be treated.  No one would ever look at me and think that I was korean.  Crisis resolved.  Yay mom.  But I was forever changed in how I looked at race, ethnicity, culture and diversity.  It was a good change; it brought a level of awareness of the good, the bad and the ugly.  But, it also brought with it a profound appreciation for our differences and how then can enrich our lives. 

I do identify as a black woman.  I also love and celebrate my korean heritage.  I think that I am lucky, though.  Because I know that so many others who are mixed do not have this solidarity and conviction in their bi/multiracial identity.  There are times that have been interesting for me.  For example, the LA riots.  I had to defend the koreans to the blacks and the blacks to the koreans.  And then there are the times when I have had to deal with 'not being black enough.'  But all in all, I am thankful to say that I am relatively unscathed and embrace my identity.  So, I refer back to my answer to the question: I am human.  I am a human being living and loving a diverse experience and benefiting from all that comes with it.  And work on your grammar, boo.